Moving Past the Anxiety of Quitting Your First Job
You may have heard that we are in something called the Great Resignation. Doesn’t sound familiar? Let me give you the cliffs notes…
After two years of heightened pandemic chaos, the American people are starting to change their perspective on what their lives should look like. We have been told to work for 60 years, then retire and live off social security income and/or investments, but watching so many of our fellow humans die to a virus we cannot see has gotten a lot of people looking at life more seriously. Why stay in a job you hate for 30+ years to (hopefully) retire with something more than $1000/month? Especially if your employer doesn’t treat you with the same respect and dignity that it is asking of their employees. The r/antiwork sub on Reddit has a lot of active reasons why it may be time to really take a look at the treatment your employer is giving you.
Is it worth it?
Let’s say, for argument sake, that it’s not. Though, I probably can guess that it isn’t based on you reading this article. Your job currently, is meant to only serve one purpose, to provide you funds. Now, these funds can be used to pay your necessary expenses like rent and food, discretionary expenses like clothing or travel or save for retirement. Another option is to provide you with funds to be able to take your life to the next level. This next level could be paying off debt so therefore you aren’t tied to a creditor, or it could be investing in a business or adventure that you’ve always wanted to take part in. Whatever the reason may be, the key takeaway is that your job is not meant to be your end-all-be-all. Your job is only supposed to take you to that next level, you do not owe your job anything.
What we have discovered during this pandemic is that companies, regardless of how much you’ve contributed to them, will only keep you if they can maintain their desired profit margins. The minute you start costing more than you earn the company, you are gone.
You should treat your employer the same way.
Easier said than done! Our society has turned “productivity” and “hustle culture” into buzzwords that inadvertently determine your worth. So when it comes time to say you want to leave your job, you are met with a large amount of anxiety that is due to how much you’ve trained your brain to believe that you need this job to therefore elevate in society.
So how do we combat this?
First, let’s look at the facts. The practicality of the situation. There are good bosses out there, just like there are bad companies. Judgment from others will come. Surround yourself with the ones who understand. Pay attention to facts only.
Understand where the anxiousness is coming from. When these anxious feelings come up, what are the thoughts? Are you worried about finding another job, where your next paycheck will come from? Are you afraid of judgment?
Weigh your pros and cons. Is the paycheck worth the treatment? The stress? The commute?
Plan. Plan. Plan. I’m not saying be reckless, but have a safety net available. Get your resume up to date, go to meetups and take courses in what you’re interested in. Have a nest egg available.
Give yourself time. When you are ready to pull the trigger, you may think you want to find another job in a month and give yourself 2 weeks vacation. I advise against this. It will take your mind about two weeks to adjust to the fact that you are no longer employed. From there, depending on your situation another 1-2 of anxiety riddled “I shouldn’t have quit” thoughts. These can be crippling, but it is important to pay close attention during this time. During this period (and it can range for anyone) you must change the narrative of your thoughts. You must put yourself first, and stand tall on your reasonings for leaving. From there you are finally able to rest. However it wasn’t until the end of my second month from working that I truly felt like this was a good decision for me to leave.